The struggle

Tonight, you broke my heart. You told me that you missed your friends at Ms Courtneys, you had a boy in your class named Cash who was being mean and teasing you about your friendship with Connor. You missed Mrs Jansen and the kids from preschool. You said those kids were nicer. I asked you if mrs King was nice, you said yes. I asked you to tell me about some of the nice kids in your class and you did.

It is interesting to me because as your mom, I immediately went into "fix it" mode. What can I do? Have kids over for playdates? Let Ruby play at Ms Courtneys more? Let her visit Mrs Jansen? Go to private school? Homeschool?

And then... I remembered something I heard on NPR. How Americans encourage traits, and when their goals aren't met, or they have to struggle and fail, they are less likely to try again.

Asian families stress the importance and the honor of persisting through the struggle. That the struggle and learning to keep trying despite setbacks is the really important part of any issue.

I like that. So I am going to comfort and reassure you, give you the tools to know you can do it and you will get through this, and just love you. I will try to teach you that sometimes it is the struggle that is the lesson I am teaching.